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ask | archive | Religion of Jace |
Touch My Mangoes
[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]
| Ludacris | |
| Move Bitch (Get Out the Way) | |
| Golden Grain |
I’M NOT EVEN SORRY
oops I forgot to reblog this
I do this in public as well,
then proceeds to take 1000000000000 tit pics
me:
if someone eats themself, are they a narcissistic cannibal?
mom:
well..you can say that they are
mom:
full of themself
this girl who rode my bus once came up to me and was like “oh my god dont get offended or anything but are you GAAAAAAAAAAY?!” and i was like yeah and then she was like “OH MY GOD WE HAVE TO HANG OUT AND GO SHOPPING” and i was like “dont get offended or anything but are you ASIAN?!” and she was like “omg yeah im filipino” and i was like “OH MY GOD WE HAVE TO MAKE SPRING ROLLS AT YOUR HOUSE SOME TIME” and she never talked to me again
Teacher:
Time to hand in the homework, everyone. Now, I know I said it would be pretty low-key, but-
Me:
LOKI?
Teacher:
Pardon?
Me:
The God of Mischief.
Teacher:
...okay. So, where's your homework?
Me:
I don't have it.
Teacher:
What?
Me:
I sent it off, I know not where.
Teacher:
Are you feeling okay? You're speaking a little strange...
Me:
Is it madness? IS IT?
Teacher:
Hey, watch your tone-
Me:
WHY? BECAUSE I'M THE MONSTER PARENTS TELL THEIR CHILDREN ABOUT AT NIGHT?
Teacher:
Okay, I think you need to-
Me:
How's your coffee?
Teacher:
What?
Me:
You can't survive without your coffee, right? Like gas in the tank?
Teacher:
I don't-
Me:
There's no gas in the tank.
Teacher:
What-
Me:
I took the caffeine out. Decaf. It's decaffeinated. You're going to get TIRED and fall ASLEEP. Ohohohohohohoho, you're going to look like such an ASS.
Teacher:
Okay, I think it's time for-
Me:
LOKI'D.
Teacher:
Could someone escort her up to the Principal's office?
Me:
NO. YOU ARE ALL OF YOU BENEATH ME.
Teacher:
Preferably several someones?
Me:
I AM A GOD. I WON'T BE BULLIED BY A-
Teacher:
Restrain her.
Me:
*being dragged away* I DO WHAT I WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaant...
Teacher:
What even.
Friend:
You know, she may not have done her homework, but you can be damn sure she'll avenge it.
